Follow Through

If I had to make a broad statement about American men I would have to say that they don't call enough. Now, I don't expect to hear from a guy every day, but at least 2-3 times a week is standard operating procedure for dating. I also expect the guy to be the one to call more often than the girl. The thing is, we really need a way to gauge how much a guy is thinking of us. If he is calling frequently enough, we know we come across his mind on a regular basis. Conversely, not calling makes us wonder if he even cares. The most important of instances is just after the first date. It is the most crucial point in which a guy makes an indelible impression of how interesting he is in a girl. A few weeks ago I got a text message from Mike mid afternoon. I had not heard from him in about 3 days, and the most I got out of him was "I am so busy" and a "lots of stuff going on right now." Now I don't know if the dictionary defines blowing someone off as sending two texts about being busy rather than calling, but in my opinion that is the very definition of one. So naturally I decided to write him off (if you read the previous post, clearly, that didn't last long). After about a week I finally (against my better judgement) sent him a message via email. I wrote him a short message about how I am sure he is busy, and probably also seeing other people, so clearly things were not going to get serious with us, but we could still be friends. Within minutes of him reading this I was replied to via text and email. He still wanted to see me. He didn't understand why I thought he was blowing me off. Hello?! Not hearing the voice of someone who you are dating in over a week doesn't really say "I am trying to become and integral part of your life" to me. Right? Am I crazy? Anyhow, so after all of this I decide to go in for round two. I was supposed to see Mike on Friday night (now, if you didn't read the last post, he and I have vastly different schedules, so making time to meet is hard), but he didn't wind up being available until nearly 2am, so we postponed until Monday. Saturday night rolls around and somewhere around 4am he texts me to see if he can come over. Now, it was a crazy night and there was a snowstorm, so the humanitarian in me allowed what definitely was "shaping-up-to-be-a-booty-call" pass. If he died in the snow, I would feel badly (or at least that is what I told myself). He arrived at my place around 5am. Within minutes we were having sex (yet again, without him making enough of an effort to pay attention to my needs....he and I REALLY have to talk about that), and then we fell asleep. He left in the morning after promising to see me Monday like we had originally planned...but alas, he wound up "sick" and home on Monday instead. What was I thinking?