The Final Blow

Rafi is cooked. Baked. Fried. Eaten for breakfast. He woke me up at 6am to talk. It was his impression that I would be available to see him before work. I was in no way thinking that I would get up for this bastard at 6am and drive over to his house to service him before he went to work. For the entirety of the relationship I have been last on his list of priorities. He has been much higher on mine. Knowing that someone who you are interested in is barely concerned with your existence is much like being in high school and having a crush on the most popular boy when you are considered a geek. Needless to say choosing to go through that emotionally again has been very trying. I am finished with the situation. As attracted as I am to him, Rafi is clearly not able to give me what I need and I have to accept that. There must be someone out there for me, but he is just not it. At this point in my life I am really looking for a relationship. I have been casually dating for so long now that I feel I need to really build something rather than just spinning my wheels (and racking up notches on my bedpost).